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Style:
Passive Voice
Intransitive verbs (be, exist, become)
cannot cross over and take objects. Used too often, they flatten a
sentence by announcing ideas rather than using them. Transitive verbs
like have, get, go, used too often, dull the prose:
There are many reasons why I came to
Amherst, and one of them is that at Amherst there are more kinds of
people than there were in my home town. In my home town of Gravel Switch
there were mostly farmers and small businesspeople. Hardly any young
people went to college, so when I had the chance to come to Amherst, I
thought it was a good idea.
Rewritten with more active verbs, the
passage shows more of the author's interest in his subject:
Amherst appeals to me because it
offers me the chance to meet different people from those in my home
town. In Gravel Switch I knew mostly farmers and small businesspeople.
Hardly any young people went to college. So when Amherst accepted me, I
felt great.
Replacing there is, there are, etc. with
active verbs also saves words: saving words makes the writing leaner and
more muscular.
Passive Voice
Intransitive Verbs
Too Many Little Words
Adverbitis
Hitchhikers, Babblers, and Jaw-Flappers
Windy and Pretentious Language
Balance and Consistency
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